after trying all week to process my thoughts and find some way to effectively communicate them to you...i've realized it's just not gonna happen. there has been too much to take in recently. anyway, here's my attempt...

.charleston was, in fact, hellaciously hot. and beautiful. the highlight of the trip would probably be dinner at cypress, a sufficiently swanky restaurant downtown, and dessert at kaminsky's...the evening was capped off by some guy hitting on me when karl and i stopped in to hear a band playing at a quaint little irish pub. his line? "so, i was wondering if you had any gum?" ummm...what? is that the best you can do?

we shopped, we laughed at people on blind date in the hotel room, and we had a tiny slice of time at the beach. now...this description might lead you to believe that we had a relaxing trip. only not. the three of us were actually looking forward to getting back to a-town to rest. and even though we moaned about our lack of relaxation for a little bit, we could not deny that God had sent the three of us to charleston for a specific purpose...a friend in need of love, support, and counsel. it was hard. sad. frustrating. eye-opening. draining. apparently, a drama-free weekend was not what we needed...even though we thought so.

.several unrelated instances of drama recently have reinforced a couple of crucial points for me.
...the counsel of trusted Christian friends should be sought out, taken seriously, and acted upon (in most every case). usually, friends can see our personal situations with a great deal more clarity and objectivity than we are able to muster. and they are our friends, after all...that implies that they love us and want only the best, least painful, path for our lives. watching dear friends suffer the pain that can be caused when this type of advice is ignored has made me want to never, ever make that mistake again. and it has also made me appreciate the people in my life who are not afraid to tell me the tough stuff.
...the heart can be so fickle. emotions change quickly at times, and it is often hard to distinguish between what we want and what He wants. we have become so adept at deceiving ourselves that we will believe whatever suits our desires...almost. thank God that He speaks continually, even when we choose to ignore Him. and that He is patient with us as we come to realize that He is all we need. and that He has placed His Spirit inside of us to guide us...if we will only step away and let Him take the reins.

.and finally...i have to rant a little about something that has been on my mind for a while. why is motherhood often considered some sort of lesser calling? i know that a lot of you women understand what i mean, since i have discussed it with a number of you. it seems that many Christians these days (often men--not all men, of course...but some) dismiss this calling as inferior or not truly a calling. now, don't get me wrong...i do not think that all women are called to be mothers. certainly all women are not called to stay at home with their children and take care of the household. we all have unique, equal callings on our lives. no calling is less/more important than another. yet, many women (especially those of us who are single) are made to feel that saying "i am called to be a wife and mom, and support my husband," is not enough...like we are just lonely women desperately searching for mr. right. that may be true of some women (okay, it's definitely true of some women). but there are those of us who just know that we were created to be wives and moms. men, try to understand and respect where we are coming from ...and please don't assume that our calling means we have no dreams or passions. they're just different from most these days.

...lots of info, i know. hope you weren't completely bored, offended, or outraged. just some things that have been wandering around in my head.